Jonathan Martensson wrote “Feelings are much like waves, we can’t stop them from coming but we can choose which one to surf.” In Perceptual Control Theory (PCT), behavior is described in terms of a negative feedback loop. You record the world around you and within you as perceptions. These perceptions are then compared to your desired perceptions (reference perceptions). Your actions are your attempts to reduce the discrepancy between the present state and the desired state. When your perceptions closely match or exceed your desired state you may say you are happy, peaceful, joyful, excited, etc. Conversely, when your perceptions are far away from your desired state, you may say you are sad, angry, frustrated or something else. You create the emotional waves within you. When you allow yourself to fully feel your emotions as they come, you tend to let them go easily. When you resist they persist and you tend to suffer more. You cre...
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