Full Disclosure - Blog Relay



As a track coach in Junction City I learned that the precision of passing the baton in a relay race is often the difference between winning or losing the race. Watching the young women practice the handoff taught me the value of team work and the art of relying on your team mates. I often rely on my friends to provide insight and support as I travel my race through this earthly journey. When Kelli Spencer asked me to be part of a blogging relay I immediately said “Yes!” For me it was an opportunity to be part of a team and to pass the baton onto others.

Kelli is an amazing individual who taps into nature, angels and people to help others restore their natural state of well-being. I met her through a mutual friend, Twyla as we participated in a book club for several years. Today Kelli has her own blog www.lovethelifeyouhave.com; she is working on a book and enjoying ever minute of her home in the country. I turn to her blog when I find myself asking “What the heck is going on?” I read about her insights and there in the message is the information I need to make sense of the universe's lessons.

She has passed the baton onto me, and now it's my turn to answer four questions as we run the race of full disclosure.
  1. What am I working on?
  2. How does my work differ from others of the same genre? 
  3. Why do I write what I do?
  4. How does my writing process work?
What am I working on?
Right now I'm finishing the long awaited teen book; It's Your Life Don't Ever Forget It: Eight Keys to Independence. The book is full of stories from those I work with and ideas about how to make it through the teen years with less stress and more opportunities. Like always it teaches the basic ideas of Perceptual Control Theory. (More on that later.)

I'm also working on the second book in the BE-Print series. The first was Creating Your BE-Print: Drafting Your Personal Blueprint for Living which encouraged individuals to examine their beliefs, establish key principles and then live in alignment with their beliefs and principles. This second book will focus on the four transformational life skills of: letting go, imagineering, mindfulness, and healthy self-evaluation. In preparation for the book I have been reading, studying and testing out ideas on my radio show, (www.blogtalkradio.com/becreating) on my blog, in the courses I teach and with myself. In fact Glenn Smith and I are preparing a series of short evening sessions the third Thursday of every month starting in August on these four life skills. So if you live in the Charlotte area I hope you come join us. (www.shop.creatingshift.com)

Unlike most summers when I teach Connected Schools concepts this year I am traveling for SkillPath teaching business writing skills. I've taught everything from general business writing, email, copy-writing to technical writing. It has been fun working with such diverse audiences as engineers who design and write tests for Black Hawk helicopters, to those who write ad-copy for kitchen gadgets. One thing I've learned is that active voice makes a huge difference. We all love a great whodunnit!


How does my work differ from others of the same genre?
It's grounded in hard science. Everything I write, teach, and do is through the lens of Perceptual Control Theory (PCT). This lens provides me a clear understanding of the ways in which all people think, feel, and behave in a whole range of situations and contexts. William T. Powers developed and tested PCT through quantifiable ways so that functional models could be built and tested to prove its accuracy. PCT is turning the psychological world upside down, in the same way that quantum physics changed the way we view our physical environment.

Your actions in life are all part of an ongoing process of creating, achieving, and maintaining your goals. PCT asserts that all distress happens when you cannot reach or maintain your goals. Helping you help yourself then takes the form of facilitating your ability to restore control in those parts of you life where you currently feel out-of-control. The practices I employ are designed to get out of your way and let you do the work you need to do. Helping you examine your own thinking at deeper and deeper levels, until your internal conflict is exposed. The focus is on the distress rather than the symptoms, this allows for significant change with little effort. Once you have identified the conflict it's rather magical—you gain clarity and the actions you want to take appear obvious to you.

In the works is a combination online course with shorter face-to-face sessions to become certified in applications of PCT. The idea is to help helping-professional (life coaches, managers,therapists, social workers, counselors, teachers, probation officers, etc) enhance their present practices. It's a case of less is more.

The beauty for me is that this strong scientific underpinning aligns beautifully with the thinking around cutting edge ideas, including the idea that you are a co-creator of your world. As the wrist band I wear says “I Am Creating...The Best Me I Can BE!” Are you?


Why do I write what I do?
I write what I write because, I believe in it, I love it, it has made a difference in my life and the lives of others. I have often been told I would be a great salesperson—I'm not good at selling—what I'm good at is sharing what I am passionate about. Helping people know they are worthy and deserving of creating the life of their dreams is something I'm passionate about. I love to learn and I want others to share in my love for learning so I teach! Teaching is one of the greatest learning tools available to you.

For me being told what to do has never been enough. I want to know why I should do something. When I was growing up and still today, we have three different drying towels for dishes at the lake. Why? One is a lint free towel for glasses and silverware. One is for the plates, serving pieces and other plastic, because it is more absorbent. The third is for the pots and pans, because we have a gas stove and it sometimes leaves soot on the bottom of the pans. Once I understood why, I had not problem using three different towels.

My unquenchable thirst for understanding the why behind everything has been the catalyst for researching and learning throughout my life. I not only want to understand why, I want those around me to understand why. Writing is one way I teach. I understand that some learners are visual, some are auditory, some are kinesthetic and others like to read/write therefore, having multiple pathways for learners is crucial to constructing knowledge. It is also why I have a radio show, videos online and I am looking to develop a multi-media online course.

Once I understood that distress is caused by two competing goals at the same level, exploring the thought behind the thought and asking very different types of questions made sense. When you understand not only what to do but why you are doing it you become an artist. What is often in learning circles describes as consciously skilled. I want everyone to be a consciously skilled artist.

When I was four years old my father built a blackboard in our basement so I could play school. I'm not talking about one of the easel style blackboards most children have, I mean one the size of a sheet of plywood nailed to the wall. I have always been a teacher because I love to learn. My sons' often complain that I can't shut it off. I teach everywhere – IT IS MY PASSION!

How does my writing process work?
For me the key is being open and curious. For example, yesterday morning I woke to the sound of wild turkeys outside my window. First I voiced a word of gratitude and then I got curious about the meaning attached to turkeys by native cultures. So I got up and looked it up in a book I have by Steven Farmer Animal Spirit Guides. Here's part of what he had to say about turkeys, “It's important to transcend the focus on your own needs to consider the greater needs of the whole, such as your family, community , or world. You're about to receive a gift of some sort—material, spiritual, or intellectual—that could be anything from winning the lottery to a simple gift, such as witnessing a beautiful sunset. Perform some act that honors the earth, whether a sacred ceremony or simply picking up trash. Volunteer your time in selfless service for some organization that you want to support.” That night I went to a friend's cabin to check on it for her, and then watched a magnificent sunset that lasted over an hour. I took several pictures and posted them on facebook to share with others who love the lake and appreciate the spectacular show of nature that surrounds them. It inspired me to write about being open and grateful for the small gifts all around us. I'll save this bit to include in the chapter on mindfulness.

Besides being aware of my environment when I read, which anyone who knows me means three or four books at a time, I'm always writing in the margins and all over the pages. Even when I'm reading blouse rippers I often read a line of dialogue that is inspirational. Next to each of these I put a little lightbulb drawing and a word of two about my thinking. When I'm looking for inspiration I come back to these notes. In the back of many of my books I create my own index where I list page numbers and conceptual references. Right now many of the notes I'm taking are about the four life skills.

I also pay attention when others tell me a story or listen carefully when they talk about how they are applying what I've taught. All of these serve to feed my writing.

I've learned that when I'm inspired is when I write. I once heard Wayne Dyer say that the world inspire is a reference to being “in spirit.” I've never found that it works for me to set a time frame and write each day. I know that works for some it just isn't my style. I write in bursts. Usually in the morning, after a walk or right before dinner. In fact about a week ago I wrote almost all day everyday. Then I'll take some time away from the computer and the next thing I know I'm energized to write again.

Funny thing is that once I sit down and start writing I usually end up writing about something other than what I thought I was going to write about. My mind is sort of like the power-ball machine of ideas and inspirations—periodically one pops up and shortly a few more until I have enough for an article a blog or book. It's like I store them in my mind and they sort of bounce around a lot until they are ready to be written. The trick for me in writing is to freewrite—what I think of as vomiting on the page—and then go back and clean it up. I write freely, without thought to spelling, grammar, syntax just allowing spirit to move through me. Then I go back several times and rewrite. I often say in my training sessions, “No one is a writer, we are all rewriters!”

Being open to what's around me, words, experiences, nature, people provides a rich source for inspiration. Then my naturally curious nature leads me to dig deeper through research and finally I let my thoughts flow onto the page.

Just now, as I was writing this I was lamenting the fact that I had put out oranges for the oriels and although there was evidence they had been eating them, I'd missed them each time. All of a sudden I heard a different bird call looked out through the screen-door and there was the oriel perched on a bench for a moment calling to me to pay attention. He promptly headed to the orange and allowed me to revel in his splendor. “Oriole will teach by listening to the heart, you will sing your song with the joy of many possibilities... he brings a sense of joy to the world.” That's what I want to do help people bring a sense of joy to their lives.

That's much how writing is for me—something calls to me, I pause to be grateful and then experience the joy of words as they flow onto page.

Jennifer Hoffman has graciously agreed to take the blog baton and continue on. As part of our book club experience Kelli, Twyla, others and I would open our sessions by reading Jennifer's weekly articles. We would always find them inspiring, grounding and food for thought. We so enjoyed our discussions centered around her messages that we invited Jennifer to Minnesota to do some work with us and invited guests.

Her energy is amazing and calming, her insights are inspirational and her gift for taking complex ideas and making them applicable to your daily life is a delight. As Jennifer says “We live in interesting, changing and challenging times. We also live in times of amazing potential and possibility, where we truly have the opportunity to be, have and do it all. This is the time for us to dream big, spread our wings and choose to experience a wonderful life because everything we could possibly wish for is within our reach, when we choose mastery.” You can find her and continue the Full-Disclosure blog relay at http://enlighteninglife.com.  

Comments

  1. Thank you Kelli Spencer and Jennifer Hoffman

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  2. What a lovely disclosure Shelley. Although, I know you, I also realise we really never know anyone so this just brought out more about you and it was so enjoyable to read. :) Thank you for playing.

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