Challenge Day #16

Dad/ George Workman

Whoopi!  I’m half way through – and boy does it feel good.  I know several authors who write every day, often setting a word count target for their writing.  I’m learning it is a very different process to write each day rather than when I’m writing because I have a passion to share a specific message. When I’ve written my books, I often will chunk out the parts and set goals for completing certain sections on a timeline, but writing a new blog every day isn’t the same.  I have had to tap into a different mindset and a different set of writing skills. 

This morning I started my day reading a book I’ve had sitting in the stack for a while.  The ‘to read’ stack is still higher than the ‘I’ve read’ stack for the summer but I’m making progress.  Having finished Originals by Adam Grant (which I’d highly recommend), I started Carol Dweck’s book, Mindset The New Psychology of Success: How we can learn to fulfill our potential.  I’d already done some reading and video learning about growth mindset so I wanted to dig in and see what’s behind it.  As I wrote to two of my colleagues this morning “This book is so PCT (Perceptual Control Theory) – She’s talking about transformational change by changing a high-level reference.”  In a nutshell, it’s about surrounding a child with an I think I can attitude and a love for the process of  challenging learning. 

When I read “This growth mindset is based on the belief that your basic qualities are things you can cultivate through your efforts.” I realized that this was a message my father had sent to me every day of my life.  He would often say to me, “If you have a textbook you can get an ‘A’; it doesn’t matter who the teacher is.”  “You can do whatever you set your mind to do.”  And the most powerful one – “Shelley don’t sell yourself short – you can be anything you want to be, you just have to work at it.”  In my house these weren’t just words, they were modeled and reinforced by opportunities. 

You see both my parents were first generation college graduates. I never questioned that someday I would go to college and that I could become anything I wanted to become.  Clearly, in my house you were in control of what you did and who you became.  Blaming someone or something else just wasn’t an option.  The flip side was it was okay to make a mistake. It was part of learning. Well, one time at least – after that it was considered a choice you had made.  This didn’t mean you didn’t ‘pay the price’ for your decisions; it just meant taking risks was part of growing up. 

My dad was a rather quiet man. However, he did have a strong presence.   He had a subtle humble way of showing his strength, his intelligence and his compassion. He wasn’t demonstrative in anyway – just steady, predictable and supportive. The only time I ever remember him raising his voice was when I lipped off to my mother in the way only a teenage daughter can do.  I was quickly reminded, “You will never!  Ever! Talk to your mother in that way every again!”  He was respected by his colleagues and loved by young children who met him.  It was almost impossible to be around my dad and not feel safe.  He designed and built my favorite place in the world – our family cabin.

Besides teaching me to believe in a growth mindset he showed me that if you know you don’t need to show and if you show you probably don’t know. He was the first of two humble geniuses I have had the pleasure of knowing in my life.  The other was William T. Powers the originator of PCT.  But I’ll save him for another day. 

I miss you dad!